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October 31, 2004


Buck Maxner decided to visit the super spin zone this weekend, with Faux News host Shill O’Wiley.


O’Wiley:  Dr. Maxner.  Thanks for visiting the super spin zone.  John Kerry has refused to come into the super spin zone because he’s afraid.  At least you are not afraid, Dr. Maxner.

Maxner:  No.  No I’m not.

O’Wiley:  Let’s get down to business.  With the race a dead heat, with whom do you feel benefits most from your candidacy.  Bush or Kerry?

Maxner:  I’m not concerned about the other candidates, Shill.  But now that you asked, we are the fairly balanced ticket, which means we draw equally from the right and the left.

O’Wiley:  I see you continue to rip off our copyright, but I digress.  Let’s turn to a more controversial topic.  Bin Laden issued a video on Friday.  He criticized Bush for freezing in front of the school children in Florida on 9/11.  You made a similar charge.  So did Michael Moore.  Do you agree with Bin Laden?

Maxner:  What is your point, Shill?

O’Wiley:  My point is that you agree with Bin Laden.  Shouldn’t we have a president who most opposes Bin Laden?

Maxner:  Why should we be affected by anything a mass murderer has to say.  He also mocked Clinton for the Monica scandal.  So did I.  That does not mean th-

O’Wiley:  Clinton harmed the country more than any U.S. president, but that’s not the point.  The point is you support Bin Laden and Bin Laden supports you and your candidacy.

Maxner:   No, Shill. I-that’s not t-

O’Wiley:  Clearly, Bin Laden wants Bush out of office.  And why do you suppose that is?  Because Bush is nice to him?  I don’t think so.

Maxner:  Now, that’s a-

O’Wiley:  Why don’t you just move to the caves in Afghanistan so you can catch up on old times with Bin Laden and his associates.

Maxner:  That’s n-

O’Wiley:  Shut up!  Shut up!  Cut his mic.  Get this guy off my set.  I will not have this America-hating liberal treasonist on my show……..Ok…now…to my great audience, your humble servant will not back down to terrorism – ever.  It’s ideologues like Buck Maxner and Gill Biffits that most harm America.  We’re still trying to get John Kerry on our show before the election on Tuesday.  Will he make the wise choice?